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Frequently
Asked Questions
"I'm sure I read about Cloud Kissing
when I was at school many years ago but I can't remember in what
lesson"
It was probably in an English lesson. We employed for some
time a Mr. William Shakespeare as our copy writer. His most
memorable lines were:
Threatening cloudkissing Illion with annoy;
(no, we didn't understand it either)
He went on to dabble in playwriting.
"My
Cloud has gone missing. Help please."
Clouds are free-spirits and get easily bored hence a tendency to
roam. Did you give your Cloud a name? Try standing outside and calling
it (very loudly). All our clouds are trained to the cloud equivalent of
"coming to heel". Some don't.
"Where
can I store my Cloud?"
We suggest tethering your cloud to a high point. We are presently in
negotiations with various planning departments in order to obtain permission to erect Cloud Tethering Masts around the U.K., though we
must say that we are finding the London Authorities particularly
obstructive to our plans to erect a mast on Nelson's Column.
"Do
aircraft cause pain to Clouds?"
The jury is out on this one but the consensus of opinion is
that they are distressing our Clouds. It is no fun having a 747 going
straight through your middle - and Concordes have very pointy noses We
have been in contact with the various major airlines about this matter
since manned flight was invented and to date it has been very difficult
to receive any commitment to resolve this problem. Recently
Richard Branson has been more understanding since we pinned a petition
to his balloon at 50,000 feet. He's now answering our e-mails. Wonder
why?
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